Martes, Enero 7, 2014
Lunes, Nobyembre 4, 2013
Marriage Isn’t For You
http://sethadamsmith.com/2013/11/02/marriage-isnt-for-you/
***This post is copyrighted and I am not the owner of this story. I just love the message so I copy it.***
***This post is copyrighted and I am not the owner of this story. I just love the message so I copy it.***
Kim and I
Having been married only a year and a half, I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for me.
Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.
I met my wife in high school when we were 15 years old. We were friends for ten years until…until we decided no longer wanted to be just friends. :) I strongly recommend that best friends fall in love. Good times will be had by all.
Nevertheless, falling in love with my best friend did not prevent me from having certain fears and anxieties about getting married. The nearer Kim and I approached the decision to marry, the more I was filled with a paralyzing fear. Was I ready? Was I making the right choice? Was Kim the right person to marry? Would she make me happy?
Then, one fateful night, I shared these thoughts and concerns with my dad.
Perhaps each of us have moments in our lives when it feels like time slows down or the air becomes still and everything around us seems to draw in, marking that moment as one we will never forget.
My dad giving his response to my concerns was such a moment for me. With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raisethem? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”
It was in that very moment that I knew that Kim was the right person to marry. I realized that I wanted to make her happy; to see her smile every day, to make her laugh every day. I wanted to be a part of her family, and my family wanted her to be a part of ours. And thinking back on all the times I had seen her play with my nieces, I knew that she was the one with whom I wanted to build our own family.
My father’s advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today’s “Walmart philosophy”, which is if it doesn’t make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one.
No, a true marriage (and true love) is never about you. It’s about the person you love—their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams. Selfishness demands, “What’s in it for me?”, while Love asks, “What can I give?”
Some time ago, my wife showed me what it means to love selflessly. For many months, my heart had been hardening with a mixture of fear and resentment. Then, after the pressure had built up to where neither of us could stand it, emotions erupted. I was callous. I was selfish.
But instead of matching my selfishness, Kim did something beyond wonderful—she showed an outpouring of love. Laying aside all of the pain and aguish I had caused her, she lovingly took me in her arms and soothed my soul.
Marriage is about family.
I realized that I had forgotten my dad’s advice. While Kim’s side of the marriage had been to love me, my side of the marriage had become all about me. This awful realization brought me to tears, and I promised my wife that I would try to be better.
To all who are reading this article—married, almost married, single, or even the sworn bachelor or bachelorette—I want you to know that marriage isn’t for you. No true relationship of love is for you. Love is about the person you love.
And, paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive. And not just from your significant other, but from their friends and their family and thousands of others you never would have met had your love remained self-centered.
Truly, love and marriage isn’t for you. It’s for others.
This post originally appeared on ForwardWalking.com, a website dedicated to helping people move forward in life.
Huwebes, Oktubre 17, 2013
Janie Fricke - you changed my life in moment (with lyrics)
The nights the sky was filled with clouds
My worried mind was filled with fears
I couldn't count all the lonely hours
Spent with memories and tears
I never thought I would see the day
When I could throw all my sorrow away
But then you came and you showed me the way
You have made all those times disappear
You changed my life in a moment
And I'll never be the same again
You changed my life in a moment
And it's hard for me to understand
With a touch of your hand
In a moment of time
All my sorrow is gone
I never thought that I could change
Could change so much in so many ways
I'm still surprised when I look in my mirror
To see that I still look the same
You changed my life in a moment
And I'll never be the same again
You changed my life in a moment
And it's hard for me to understand
With a touch of your hand
In a moment of time
All my sorrow is gone
You changed my life
I'll never be the same
You changed my life in a moment
And it's hard for me to understand..
Forevermore - Side A w/ lyrics (+playlist)
There are times
When I just want to look at your face
With the stars in the night
There are times
When I just want to feel your embrace
In the cold of the night
I just can't believe that you are mine now
[Chorus:]
You were just a dream that I once knew
I never thought I would be right for you
I just can't compare you with
Anything in this world
You're all I need to be with forevermore
All those years I've longed to hold you in my arms
I've been dreaming of you
Every night,
I've been watching all the stars that fall down
Wishing you would be mine
I just can't believe that you were mine now
[Chorus]
Time and again
There are these changes that we cannot end
Sure a star that keeps going on and on
My love for you will be forevermore
Wishing you would be mine
I just can't believe that you were mine now
You were just a dream that I once knew
I never thought I would be right for you
I just can't compare you with
Anything in this world
As endless as forever
Our love will stay together
You're all I need to be with forever more
(As endless as forever
Our love will stay together)
You're all I need
To be with forevermore...
" GOD GAVE ME YOU - Bryan White " (+playlist)
For all the times I felt cheated, I complained
You know how I love to complain
For all the wrongs I repeated, though I was to blame
I still cursed that rain
I didn't have a prayer, didn't have a clue
Then out of the blue
God gave me you to show me what's real
There's more to life than just how I feel
And all that I'm worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn't know why
Now I do, 'cause God gave me you
For all the times I wore my self pity like a favorite shirt
All wrapped up in that hurt
For every glass I saw, I saw half empty
Now it overflows like a river through my soul
From every doubt I had, I'm finally free
I truly believe
God gave me you to show me what's real
There's more to life than just how I feel
And all that I'm worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn't know why
Now I do, 'cause God gave me you
In your arms I'm someone new
With ever tender kiss from you
Oh must confess
I've been blessed
God gave me you to show me what's real
There's more to life than just how I feel
And all that I'm worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn't know why (didn't know why)
Now I do (I finally do), 'cause God gave me you (God gave me You)
God gave me you
" GOD GAVE ME YOU - Bryan White " (+playlist)
For all the times I felt cheated, I complained
You know how I love to complain
For all the wrongs I repeated, though I was to blame
I still cursed that rain
I didn't have a prayer, didn't have a clue
Then out of the blue
God gave me you to show me what's real
There's more to life than just how I feel
And all that I'm worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn't know why
Now I do, 'cause God gave me you
For all the times I wore my self pity like a favorite shirt
All wrapped up in that hurt
For every glass I saw, I saw half empty
Now it overflows like a river through my soul
From every doubt I had, I'm finally free
I truly believe
God gave me you to show me what's real
There's more to life than just how I feel
And all that I'm worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn't know why
Now I do, 'cause God gave me you
In your arms I'm someone new
With ever tender kiss from you
Oh must confess
I've been blessed
God gave me you to show me what's real
There's more to life than just how I feel
And all that I'm worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn't know why (didn't know why)
Now I do (I finally do), 'cause God gave me you (God gave me You)
God gave me you
Love of My Life - The Wedding Song (+playlist)
I love you, the love of my life
I need you, our love is right
I've found the one that my soul loves
No other love means so much
I prayed to my God for a heart to keep
He gave me the one, He knew my needs
Over and over this love is sweet
I recognize the joy that makes our love complete
God gave you to me
You're the one I prayed for long ago
Fearless trust I never thought I'd know
I've found the answer to my dreams
My eyes were opened to love's mystery
I prayed to my God for a heart to keep
He gave me the one, He knew my needs
Over and over this love is sweet
I recognize the joy that makes our love complete
God gave you to me
The love of my life
I love you, the love of my life
I need you, our love is right
I've found the one that my soul loves
No other heart gives so much
God gave you to me
You're the one I love
You are the love of my life
More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/love_of_my_life_lyrics_darla_day.html
All about Darla Day: http://www.musictory.com/music/Darla+Day
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